Birds.........: The Stork Has Landed!

Monday 15 November 2010

The Stork Has Landed!

I thought summat was amiss when I pedalled past our Alexs house at six o'clock this mornin' and all the lights were on. Al' had gone into labour and our Lee had rushed her off to the NSRI just before I went past. Good job too because the little man was only minutes away from hatchin'! It's a good job they didn't wait any longer he was born at 0715. If you ask moi he must have bloody fell out!!!

A beautiful fair haired and blue eyed baby boy weighing in at just over 8lb. No name yet but I'll call him Tiger or Champ' anyway. All I need to do now is convince his dad that he'd be better off growin' up a Leeds fan.

Back to the darts now folks.

2 comments:

Richard Powell16 November 2010 at 20:39
Congratulations Grandad! Hope you're wetting the baby's head?
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Andy17 November 2010 at 17:28
You know the score by now pal. It will be well and truely soaked!!!
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Glossary

'ave a buchas: North Staffs slang meaning to look at something.
Aviarazzi: a recently penned phrase to describe the ever expanding glut of bird "photographers".
Barwit: Bar-Tailed Godwit.
Big Daddy: huge seventies wrestler. Famous for the Daddy Splash!
Blithers: Blithfield Reservoir.
Blocker: a blocker would be something like Yellow-throated Vireo, a bird that is on very few modern day twitchers lists and would cause a bit of a stampede. Another good example would be Golden-winged Warbler.
Blockheads: Black-headed Gulls.
Bostin': great, good, super... a phrase i picked up workin' in Wolvo.
Bothdee: birthday
Brookers: Brookleys Lake, popular with Fudge Ducks.
Brown Bread: dead.
Brum: Birmingham.
Bupooter: Computer.
Can's : Canada Geese.
Caspo: Caspian Gull.
CBA: Cheesedale Bird Alert.
Chaydle: local slang for Cheadle/Cheesedale. I live in Chaydle but do most of my birdin' at Utch.
Cheesedale: alias Cheadle a Staffordshire market town.
Cheesedalien: inhabitant of Cheesedale.
Chicken Scoffer: nickname given to a birders ex who was partial to the odd roast chicken or two on the way back from his latest twitch.
Chip Eater: inhabitant of the potteries.
Chipper: not well, unwell, ill.
Cream Crackered: knackered, tired, worn out .....
Crippler: see MEGA.
Cripplin': breathtakin', orgasmic, superb...... really good.
Crispy Duck: unpopular delicacy among big heifers.
Crosser: Crossbill.
Dude: a birder with top quality optics, outdoor clobber etc..... who would probably think a Tertial is a kind of Dove!!!
Eddle Preddle: Elvis Presley.
Fudge Duck: Ferruginous Duck.
Gazunders: Goosanders
GND: Great Northern Diver
Granny Smiths: type of apple. Best left for winter thrushs.
Gruel: poor food normally served to unwanted guests or husbands.
Gypo Goose: Egyptian Goose an ugly avian brute if ever there was one.
Gypo Goose: Egyptian Goose.
Habo: habitat
Jack and Danny: fanny.
Jizz: a combination of characteristics which identify a bird in the field.
Kosher: genuine, real.
lags : Greylag Geese.
Lappy: large green wading bird that looks like an escaped Cockatiel got lucky with one of the locals.
LEO: Long-eared Owl.
Lurgy: illness.
Macky D's: Mcdonalds home of the golden arch's.
Mandies: Mandarins, ducks not small oranges.
MEGA. normally reserved for a bird that as only occured a few times before or never! A Cheesedale Mega would be a Gadwall.
Mince Pies: eyes.
Mr Benn: popular childrens character from the seventies.
Mudpeckers: Waders.
Muntcateers: local deer hunters.
Nogger: north staffordshire slang for football. "are we havin' a game of nogger then"?
Numpty: scottish term popularised by former Ipswich Town frontman Alan Brazil.
Nut Nibbler: woodpecker or squirrel.
Nut Pecker: woodpecker. A name first used by our Alex when she was a toddler, a long time ago now.
Oik: birders slang for Oystercatcher and also another name for a spotty herbert or little t##t.
Old Beanflirter: mate, pal, friend, mucker etc...
Pinkies: Pink-footed Geese.
Pipin': name given to the manic head down displaying of Oystercatchers.
Pour moi: for me.
Poxey: Croxden Quarry.
Razzle: popular reference material for people interested in Woodcock.
Robin Stroker: some one with a passing interest in birds. And normally has his/her very own pet Robin in the garden!
Rubber Shelduck: Ruddy Shelduck
Ruby Murray: Currie.
Samovar: Russian tea pot thingy.
Sherbert: anything wet, especially Kronenbourg, Export, Grolsch etc...
Skitterin': a light coverin' of snow.
Slog Iron: Mountain Bike.
snappin': snappin' time, North Staffs slang for lunch,dinner, tea etc dependin' on which shift you are on.
Spiflicated: even I can't give a definition of this, it's easier read than said!
Stockers: Stock Doves.
T Cups: pottery drinkin' vessels or an item of female clothin' used for a bit of support.
The Potteries: local name for Stoke-on-Trent, home to Master Potter Josiah Wedgewood.
The Weaves: The Weaver Hills.
Tickle Tackle: use your imagination on that one.
Tom tits: normally occurs after to much cider.
Trigger: famous countin' steed of the singin' cowboy Roy Rodgers.
UTB: Under The Belt. A phrase some times used to describe finally seein' a bird.
Utch: Uttoxeter Quarry.
vismig: Visible Migration, popular among birders who can get out for an hour or two before work. Normally takes place on some windy hilltop.
Wag's: small ground feedin' passerines or alternatively foxy chicks with loaded nogger playin' other halves.
Whoppers: large white birds....Whooper Swans.
wingus intactus: fully winged and hopefully unringed!
Wobbler: warbler
Wolvo: Wolverhampton better parts of which include Low Hill, The Scotlands, Heath Town, Ellerton Walk and Chervil Rise.
Wom: home.
Wood Pig': Wood Pigeon
Y'ammer: Yellowhammer.
Y-fronts: practical item of underwear ideal for those cold mornings when you've had one brew to many. Popular with Polish vizmiggas.
YLG: Yellow-legged Gull.

Only Jokin' Owd Duck.

This one crippled me today, it's a belter!

A policeman with a sniffer dog came up to me the other day and said, "my dog tells me you're on drugs." "ME!" I said "you're the one with the f####in' talkin' dog!!!!"